news from the land of imploding innards.

well, well, well : bon-fucking-jour.

the next week should hopefully bring a bit of a drop-off in postings to my blog. i'm saying goodbye to paris, and to round things off a bit, goodbye to a 3-year relationship with a partner
whom i am still in love with, despite everything.

needless to say, it's all mixed up, and i'm rather at a loss as to how i should deal with it. yesterday i spent most of the day sitting on the floor, alternately crying and getting overwhelmed by folding a pair of pants. that freaked me out a bit, and today i've entirely called off responsibility and at 3pm, i am still in my pyjamas and on season 3 of sex and the city and my second baguette drowned in butter and cheese.

me watching sex and the city proves how despondent i am. dialogue-wise, i think it's a crap show, and even though i am not familiar with the mating habits of heterosexual women, i really really hope that these are fictions. those ladies rather scare me. but crap shows distract me from sitting on the floor or musing on the overwhelming nature of trousers, unlike music. i have forbidden myself to listen to:

• ani difranco
• catpower
• the alkaline trio
• elliott smith
• belle & sebastien
• nina simone
  
• really anything that falls under soothing strumming and lovely lyrics or is anyway meaningful.
  

likewise, reading is a bit too much too, which is unfortunate because i have a lot to read. comic books are about it, because like bad tv they are rife with color, movement, and are less likely to involve people talking about feelings or symbolism.

that's it. i'm trying to muster some funny or at least some sardonic for this, but all i got is a wavery willingness to find out what carrie bradshaw will be wearing in the next episode.

har.
har.
har.